Life and Death

Little side note: I've always rhymed this with light and meth. Play sports outside, get some light, and live life. Or stay inside, do some meth, and embrace death.

No hard drugs for me please. I don't want to end up not being able to help myself and having to snatch purses for my addiction.

I wrote about this topic in my "What If That's It" post. This is a very interesting idea...

I fear both ends of the spectrum, or rather that I fear the basis for both those sides. If I lived forever, I would      go insane after the first hundred years past normality. If we died and stayed in the ground for eternity, with no further concious, I fear that even more.

My philosophy: CARPE DIEM!!!!!!! SEIZE THE DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Live life to the fullest every day like you're going to die the next day! I may not always show it in class but outside of school if there's something fun to be done, I'm gonna be the one to do it first! I'm gonna be the record holder!

Wants

This is a tough one...really I don't know what I want.

I guess since I'm a dude that sex is included but other than that I've really got no idea. Maybe its that I know I want lots of things, but that I really don't care if I actually have them; either because I already have them or I could hardly ever get them even if I wanted to...

I want friends but I have tons of those already. I want a girlfriend but I've got that too...you're amazing by the way, I love you!

Money? Never have it so why bother wanting it? New skateboard? That's more of a need. I love my shoes, my teeth are straight, and I DEFINITLY don't need to lose weight.

I want my headache to go away right now there's 1 thing!

I want...food. There we go. I can never have enough of good things to eat! As an added bonus my metabolism is astronomically high so I can eat whatever I want with no consequences. Steak...yum. With mashed potatoes, gravy and pie...

Fruit by the foots, orange juice, anything on Ruby Tuesday's menu...

I'll be right back I'm hungry...

Fears

I'm afraid of bragging.
I'm afraid of tests after I've procrastinated longer than I should have.
I'm afraid of bombing out.
I'm afraid of being caught.
I'm afraid of being thought as a jerk.
I'm afraid of being boring.
I'm afraid of not a lot (this post is kinda hard)
I'm afraid of aging.
I'm afraid of failing to prove my parents wrong about my future.
I'm afraid of being paralyzed my whole life.
I'm afraid of going blind.
I'm afraid of going deaf.
I'm afraid of breaking down.
I'm afraid of being bored.
I'm afraid of not being able to play sports.
I'm afraid of dissing girls (actually I just REALLY hate it)
I'm afraid of reliance.

I'm afraid of being left behind...

Bliss

I look down at the plummeting world below me. My mind is at peace having found a way to break through the clutter and noise of the world to which i would soon return to.

The steady current of air rushes past my body, bypassing it as if I were no more significant that the clouds that the sky harbored.

If only I could fall for eternity...and why not? Maybe the world is really moving away from me as fast as I'm going towards it, and I'll be suspended in one point of space forever. What a blissful thought...

She stares at me as thought she hasn't seen me in years...her whispers reach my ears and suddenly the wind is still rushing past me, but its leaving thoughts and ideas just as fast as its traveling. She's always been there, never getting farther nor closer to me.

Always just within reach, but never vacant.

Thought I am calm, every fiber of my body vibrates, numbing me the way no dream ever could. In this I know without a doubt will last forever. I will be in suspended animation for the rest of my life, lost between the space of the horizon and the Earth.

This pergatory is where I want to be. Locked in an eternal dance.

With her.